In life, we may sometimes dread moving forward because we hide behind our lack of self-esteem
and in the words of others that have discouraged us in our past.
It may be that sometimes our emotions control us into a spiral of devastating situations.
We even hide our past, too ashamed to mention it
in our own journals. You see, when we allow God to be present in our hearts
we can overcome the different fears. Let’s stop hiding and start seeking God.
Hiding Behind Words
Moses and his speech disorder: Exodus Ch. 3, 4
Words are powerful and sometimes hurtful whether someone says it to you or
you allow yourself to believe your own self-destructing words.
Moses, when he was called by God to deliver the people out of Egypt, was so afraid that he resulted to fall back on his speech disorder, saying he could not speak to the pharaoh properly ( Ex 4:10;6:12) . Can you imagine this? Moses growing up as a child and the other kids making fun of him? It sure could have left some kind of scar on him as he saw himself not fit to follow God’s command. However, God did not allow such problems, such words of self-defeat from Moses’ lips to keep Him from using Moses. After Moses finished telling God about his “disability” of how he could not speak to the pharaoh, God declared how great HE was and how HE can do all great things unimaginable. Moses still somehow doubted (himself) and asked God to send someone else. God was angry for what Moses said and sent Moses’ brother, Aaron to speak for Moses. God’s plan continued to move forward and soon little by little Moses denied the right of his disability to control his life. Moses allowed God to finish the work He had started long ago, from when Moses was nothing but a baby floating in a river to escape his death(Ex 2:3-5). One thing to note, God did not allow Moses’ hesitant attitude to stop the promises from being fulfilled in his life. I believe as God was more and more present in Moses life, God started to become the foundation that Moses had stood on, rather his stuttering past; Not to mention his infamous labeling as a murderer to be the deciding factors of his life (Ex 2:12-14).
How many times have we made choices based on our past? I am not talking about the lessons learned from the mistakes we made but, rather in that moment when you look at yourself in the mirror and you still see your old self, old pains, still hurting. There is a saying, never forget your regrets so you don’t make the same mess. However, God is calling you to be more than your regrets, to be more than your past, and to be less of who you see in the mirror; To be more of Him in you. We need to recognize that it could be our regrets pulling us back from fully trusting God. Our regrets shouldn’t be an influencing factor on who God wants us to be. They could actually be a crutch that prevent old scars from fully healing. When Moses had his first encounter with God, it was much more about God than it was about him (Ex Ch. 3); And that my friends, may be one of the greatest example of grace that God displayed. To want to use Moses after being a murderer and even after Moses said no to God multiple times, yet God was persistent enough, loving enough, God enough to want to be that involved in Moses life. Do you know how much God wants to be part of your life? It’s not that he ignores our past or chooses to sweep it under the rug like we do sometimes to try to get by… He recognizes our faults, our mistakes, and our sins. Today it is known that he made a way and made sure that when we look at the mirror, we do not see them anymore. The old has gone the new has come! There is a difference in ignoring and defeating something. Some people may say God ignores our sin, but that is incorrect and a misjudgment of grace; This could make it seem that if He can ignore something, He can recognize it again. Micah 12:19 said of what was to come, “Once again you (God) will have compassion on us. You will trample our sins under your feet and throw them into the depths of the ocean!” Today we recognize this verse completed by what Jesus Christ did on the cross. By taking our sins and our punishment by death He gave us forgiveness and life by His resurrection. God does not ignore our sins, no he does something much greater! He took them away and he satisfied the punishment of all our mistakes and sins on Jesus Christ. Today all who calls on Jesus Christ as their savior is recognizing that their mistakes and their past do not define them but a holy and loving God does. Exodus Ch 2:12 records what Moses did, “ After looking in all directions to make sure no one was watching, Moses killed the Egyptian and hid the body in the sand.” After that, Moses ran away and spent 40 YEARS in the desert before God appeared to Moses. I encourage you not to let another day pass without recognizing what you may be hiding that could stop your growth with God. Or maybe, you may have heard of God but do not know him personally. God knew what Moses did and still accepted him. He transformed him to the great Moses we know today, not as Moses the Murderer. God knows what we all did and could be capable of doing in the future; But God loves us and provided a way out straight back into his arms of love and mercy. Let’s stop hiding and start seeking God.
Peace and much Love!